A willing heart = A changed heart.

I am a hoarder, a saver, a collector, a stasher, a poker, a stuffer, a pig.

Not in every area of my life. Not even in most areas of my life. But in those few dark closets, those few hidden shelves, those few forgotten about hide-aways...I tend to let the 'crap', for lack of a better word, pile up.

My bedroom seems to be the main focus of this disorder. It quickly becomes the catch all for empty shopping bags that I leave the receipt of my purchases in just in case I have a change of heart, the one missing sock that I am hopeful will turn up...and more than likely it's mate has already been thrown, the pants that need a button sown on or need ironing but HA! we all know that will never happen. And so the piles build.

They build and build and for so long I do not even notice. I come into my room at the end of the day, flop myself down onto the bed in utter exhaustion and I don't even SEE the chaos around me. Or maybe, I do not want to see it. Maybe if all other corners of the house appear organized than this one 'little' indulgence will not be so bad. Maybe if I contain the clutter, excess, GARBAGE to one room...my room, no one will know that this part of me exists.

But I know. And it bothers me. And He knows. And it bothers Him. He knows that my spiritual closets are full of junk as well. And even though I can go on for days, weeks, and sometimes months over-looking it and ignoring it, one day He opens my eyes.

It happens this way every time. In one moment I am content to poke around the bottom of my closet for a missing shoe...pushing aside shopping bags, fallen sweaters, and discarded pants, and in the next moment I am not. I drag on daily with a tank that is full of worldly garbage...and spiritually on empty.

I am horrified at what lies before me, within me. The dust collected on my reading lamp. The three weeks worth of newspapers under my nightstand, the cut off tags from clothing strewn across my dresser, the pairs of shoes haphazardly flung around the room, the glasses of half-full water lining the window sill, the pants that were tried on and dropped where I stood... on and on my eyes are opened to the pig-sty both around me and within me. And I feel the shame of what I am seeing and of what it implies about the resident of this room.

But like always, God restores what is damaged. He mends what is broken. And He loves despite it all. As I pick up the pieces again and again, I am reminded that I am a work in progress. And even if the rest of the world does not see my brokenness, He does. And He cares. And He heals. But only when I am ready and when my hands are active in the process as well. He longs to take out the garbage, if I will just hand it over. A willing heart...a changed heart.

BEING A WIFE & MOTHER and building a strong MARRIAGE

Hi ! My name is Susan and I blog as Penless Writer.

I am honored to have been asked to be a Guest Commentator for Multi-Tasking Mom's. I begin by quoting a past Pastor of ours who use to say "Commentators are nothing but Common Taters"!!!! I think I easily fall into that category.


When first asked to participate my reaction was, "It's been so long since I've been an active, hands on Mom I'm not sure I qualify". On further reflection, I believe living so many years (69), active mothering for over 35 of those years, being a grandmother for 21 years, and being just Mickey & I as Empty Nester's for the past 18 years I do have something to say.


Any of you who read my blog know that I am the mother of 4 adult children and that there is a 15 year age span between my first born and my fourth born. This explains why I held the active mothering position for those 35 years. It also explains why I have granddaughters 21 and 12 years old and a grandson 8 years old. You also know that we are a very close-knit family.

All this mothering experience aside I am going to comment on
BEING A WIFE & MOTHER and building a strong MARRIAGE.

I believe strongly in the family. The family is the first institution God set up. It all began when God created Eve to be a help mate for Adam. God created her to complete him. That's an awesome thought isn't it? Adam was not complete by himself alone. I believe our first, and most important role and love, after God and Jesus, is to be our husband.

We are first husband and wife and we will be husband and wife long after the children are gone from the home.
I have seen too many woman take their role of mother and motherhood to such a degree that it becomes the center of their world. Consequently the husband is pushed off to the side and into second place. They begin to live separate lives to a certain extent. The woman is concentrating all her time and effort on the children, with the husband on the side lines. The man is concentrating all his time and effort on his job. They begin to grow in separate and different ways. The wonderful husband-wife connection, which started it all, starts to fade.

My strong feelings in this regard came even before I was married or had children. I had two very loving parents and grew up in a good Christian home where I was taught good moral values, responsibility, truthfulness, hard work, etc. The one thing my family lacked was my parents lived two separate lives to a great extent. I determined, at a very early age, I wanted a marriage where my husband and I had a lot in common and were a strong family unit.

Over the years I've seen far to many mothers that have centered their lives on the children front and center. Then when the children are grown you find two adults looking at each other and saying, "Who are you? I don't know you any more. What happened to the love, fun, excitement we use to have?" The children leave and you have two strangers living together who do not share common interests or goals any longer.

So be sure to keep that guy you fell in love with front and center throughout your child rearing years. When you do this you will share a wonderful, full, exciting, "empty nest" life together.

Now, having said all this......I also have to add that.....ONCE A MOTHER ALWAYS A MOTHER. I tell my kids this ALL the time and they know it well. They are as important to me now, as adults, as they were when they were small children growing and finding out who they were and who they were becoming.

It truly is a balancing act....It's important not to fall in the ditch on either side of the road. Just remember to keep things balanced and not push either your children or your husband off to the side. Always remembering that JESUS CHRIST is the most important person to keep front and CENTER.
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Just one more comment, from this "common tator".
If you are a single-mom, as I once was, I have this advice.

When another man comes waltzing into your life your first concern has to be making sure he will be the kind of father you want to help raise your children. When Mickey & I were "dating" most of those "dates" revolved around doing things with and for my two little girls. I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, Mickey would be a wonderful father. Almost 49 years later I am here to tell you he lived up to all my expectations.

As a single-mom your first priority has to be to those children whether that means raising them by yourself or finding that right husband and FATHER.
BUT once you decide to entrust yourself and your children into the love and care of another man you must NEVER, and I mean NEVER EVER say anything like "Leave MY kids alone" or "Don't treat MY kids like that". This is of course UNLESS there is being physical harm done to them.....that's a whole different thing. But I'm talking about just establishing and making a good, caring, loving family.

When he marries you and takes on the responsibility for the love and care of you and your kids you become a "family" and the word "ME or MINE" has to be set aside forever. If there are disputes about the discipline of the children you must never discuss that in front of the children. Rather, later, in a private setting between the two of you discuss with him then, "I don't think you should have......." or "I think you were being to hard on......" This is good advise for all marriages. Put up one standard to the children at all times.

Ring that Dinner Bell

First, let me say that it is an honor to be the guest blogger today. I admire all the multi-tasking moms here that make this particular blog a fun place to go for helpful hints and the opportunity to network with each other.

Let me introduce myself. My name is Diana and I have my own blog, sunshine on my shoulders. I have been married 26 years to a wonderful husband and we have a 19 year old daughter and 17 year old son. I am also a youth worker. Sadly, I am not very good at multi-tasking. I could have used a blog like this when my kids were young.

I was once at a baby shower where we were asked to give one piece of advice to the new mother. After a little thought, it came to me. It didn’t sound very profound. In fact, it sounded a little silly compared to some of the other answers. But ever since then, I give this simple piece of advice out whenever I can and to whoever will listen because i feel it's a pro-active way the family can work at remaining a close-knit unit.

The piece of advice is this… eat dinner together as a family, at a dinner table, every night that you can. Make it a priority in your family.

This may not sound very profound and yet, I believe, it truly is. It sounds so simple, and yet it has such a powerful and positive effect on the family unit. This time is an opportunity to come together to spend time in fellowship with each other and to learn how to interact as a family. I feel this is important in a world where the family unit can be so easily split apart.

In my family, we would ask the kids what they learned that day, or, what their favorite or worst part of their day was. They could then ask us the same thing. It was a time where we were all on equal footing, where we talked and listened, where we could come together on a daily basis to learn, laugh, and love.

I don’t want to give the wrong impression. Not every meal was enjoyable. Some were downright miserable. There were definitely times where I wanted to ship my kids off to some other family. But that’s part of being a family and there’s lessons there for both children and parents. Don’t let the hard times distract you from the good that is being accomplished in the long run.

Some of you are saying, “but we do this and will continue to do so.” Great! I will tell you, though, that as the kids grow older and schedules get crazier, it will get more and more difficult. I would like to impress upon you to continue to make the family dinner time a priority, even through these more hectic times.

You might be surprised to know how many families out there don’t eat dinner together or eat in front of the t.v. set instead of the table. There are various reasons for this and I don’t want to judge. I ask those of you who fall into this category to take small steps in trying to get your family together for family dinners. You might be very surprised at the results.

I just read a survey where the top answer, from 13-24 year olds, to the question, “what makes you happy?” was spending time with family. When your children are young, this is pretty easy. As they grow up, it gets more difficult. Why not have something in place that you can keep consistent through their childhood, into early adolescence, and into young adulthood. I don’t think you’ll ever be sorry.

Thanks to multi-tasking moms for having me over and thanks for reading what I had to say today.